Today is a “happy” day.

Hugh Hefner’s ex Holly Madison was hosting a party at TAO Beach in The Venetian Resort Hotel Casino in Las Vegas, Nevada. On July 5, the gorgeous playboy model snapped in her Sinful bikini – complete with stretch marks. At age 30, the 5′7″ beauty (whose measurements are 36-23-35) probably weighing a mere 120-125lbs and yet to have children, she is hardly a prime candidate.

Judy Eddy/WENN.com

Homecoming…

It seemed like I’d not been back home in an eternity. The last time Bernard and I had touched down in Puerto Rico was around five years back, not long after we’d got married. I remembered how great it felt to take my husband home to meet my extended family; some of them like my uncle Alejandro were angry that I’d given up my education to be a housewife to a black African American man. I didn’t care of course because I was a fool in love and my family are all black/latino mixes anyway, so what was so bad about Bernard? At that point in my life, everything was perfect.

The sh*t hit the fan…

Funny ain’t it? Tania had been my close girlfriend for years; we’d known each other long before I met Bernard. I used to hang out with her since the beginning of high school and had been tight with her ever since. I never thought that Tania would try to blackmail me.

Well, well, well…

Biscuits…Pigs in a Blanket??

Is she scratching or tucking? Ain’t nothing cute bout posing and yo balls just so happen to fall out.

Are her boots and dress made out the same material. Those boots leaning and aint shite supporting them ankles.

Blame Venus and Serena.

Elle Woods? AKA outfit blowed.

Foxy Cleopatra dun went G.I. Jane on ya ass.

The Alpha Male…

I was so mad when Bernard got back from Utah. As usual, he brought home his dirty laundry and I found some lipstick on one of his shirts. Yes ladies, lipstick! and of course it wasn’t mine. The shirt also reeked of perfume…for a split second I was going to storm up to him in a rage and say ‘what the hell is this?’ but I thought about my own infidelity and backed down. What I never banked on was the possibility that my lovely, sweet and devoted Bernard would ever cheat on me. Maybe it was nothing, maybe it was just a random chick that got a little to enthusiastic. At the same time I was thinking that in my husband’s line of work he had umpteen opportunities to cheat on me and who was to say that some of his work related trips weren’t work at all?

The V.I.P.

(From the writer)
Hello again ladies,

I’ve been reading some of your comments and it’s good to know that I am entertaining y’all. A few people expressed their distaste of my lifestyle; I can only say to you that the point of these blogs is not an attempt for vindication on my part. On the contrary, I’ve been holding this inside for so long that it’s quite a release for me to be able to talk about it to Lynxx. I know that running around sleeping with random men is wrong, but I’m afraid that in just can’t help myself. When you’ve been fed plain watery oats for a lifetime and you finally taste premium roast beef, it’s a little hard to give it up. I you feel offended by my stories, then by all means I urge you to stop reading them.

Discovery….

Turns out that J was my type of guy; he was little young for me at 21, but knew how to treat a lady nonetheless. I took his number from Tania and gave him a call about a week after he’d inquired about me. We had a few light convos and I found out that he has a 19 year old girlfriend and they were expecting a baby in a few months. J expressed to me that while he didn’t mind having to pay the upkeep for a child, he felt he was too young for the responsibility. I gently explained to the naive young man that when he decided to bust inside his teen girlfriend raw, then he took on that responsibility. I also told him that there was no point crying over spilt milk (no pun intended).

He’s back……

Bernard came back home three days after my little encounter with “A”. He seemed to be in very good spirits which usually meant that he would expect a good meal and possibly some pus*y afterwards. Sometimes, I would pretend to have a headache to avoid sex with him, but this time it was different. I had cheated on my hubby and felt really guilty; the idiot even brought me back a Tiffany bracelet as a surprise gift! Needless to say, the guilt almost consumed me alive.

It’s Monday…we all hate Mondays – here’s something else I hate.

I’m sure most women would agree with me, but I don’t like seeing a hairy man. OMG just the sight of all that hair makes me sick to my stomach. I immediately visual Ben Stiller’s in Along Came Polly. Now I’ve never waxed, but I’ve heard it really hurts but you might need to get that done if your growing a chia pet on your chest. Just seeing a man walk around with a natural sweater on is just wrong.

Never be the same again…

Depressed wasn’t the word. Now that Tania and I had fallen out, I had no friends. There were people that I came into contact with on a regular basis, you know the lady at the grocery store, my yoga teacher, my hair dresser, even the bank teller, but they were all acquaintances. Not friends. To make things even worse, I think that Bernard guessed that I knew about him and Tania. When he asked me why I hadn’t been out with her in weeks, I just gave him an extremely vague ‘no reason’